Friday, April 29, 2016

New Brunswick

One of Canada's three Maritime Provinces, New Brunswick's southeastern coast borders on the Bay of Fundy. Its long western side abuts Maine and the northern end is adjacent to Quebec. The upper eastern part...shores along the Gulf of St. Lawrence. New Brunswick is the only Canadian province that is constitutionally bilingual. Its capital city is Fredericton.

The Bay of Fundy has the highest, wildest tides in the world.
New Brunswick has the warmest salt water beaches north of Virginia.
More kinds of whales can be seen more often than anywhere else.
Michias Seal Island (in the Bay of Fundy) is home to 900 pairs of breeding Atlantic puffins.
King's County is the 'covered bridge capital of Canada'.

Walk the ocean floor when the Bay of Fundy tides are out.
New Brunswick winters are defined as 'pure white gold' (annual snowfalls of 200 to 400 centimetres).
The Appalachian Range is North America's oldest mountain range.

Did You Know ...the inception of the ice-cream-cone was born in Sussex corner ~ the Dairy Capital of Canada, midway along Fundy Coastal Drive? Locals tell the story of barber, Walter Donnelly, who made a bad batch of dough. He was at loss with what to do with his crispy batter; so he ran next door to the ice-cream-parlour...and the rest, as they say, is history!

Did You Know...about the 'one that got away'? Fish stories abound in the Miramichi River in the heart of salmon country. The river boasts the best salmon fishing in the world. Just ask American test pilot, Chuck Yeager and U.S. General Norman Schwarzkopf ~ two of many famous anglers who have waded in the river.

Lights, Camera, Action: New Brunswick made history at the Nickel Theater in Saint John. They were the first to accompany 'silent movie pictures' in North America. Film mogul, Louis B. Mayer, grew up in St. John. The port city has been home to several Hollywood legends...including Walter Pidgeon and Donald Sutherland.

Cymbalyly” Fantastic: The cymbal factory in Meductic is one of the finest in North America. Musicians in over 80 countries play New Brunswick-made-Sabian cymbals. Drummers for Eric Clapton, Phil Collins and Billy well as percussionists with the Boston, Philadelphia, Los Angeles, Cleveland and New York Philharmonic Orchestras won't venture on stage without their Sabian cymbals!

A River Runs Backwards: At 'low tide', watch the St. John River crash through a narrow gorge and tumble into the harbour. Come back at 'high tide' and watch the same river go the other way. The Bay of Fundy's incredible tides are too strong for the mighty St. John River...forcing the water to flow upstream twice a day, every day. Totally Awesome!

Provincial Flower: purple violet. Bird: Black-Capped-Chickadee. Tree: Balsam Fir.
Slogan: “Hope was Restored.”
Nicknames: The Picture Province, The Loyalist Province, The Drive-Through Province (to visit).

Four Married Guys Go Fishing
After an hour of fishing, the following conversation took place.

First Guy: “You have no idea what I had to do to be able to come fishing this weekend. I had to promise my wife that I will paint every room in the house next weekend.”
Second Guy” That's nothing! I had to promise my wife that I will build her a new deck for the pool.”
Third Guy: “Man, you both have it easy. I had to promise my wife I will remodel the kitchen for her.”
They continued to talk when they realized that the 4th guy had not said a word. So they asked him. “You haven't said anything about what you had to do to come fishing this weekend. What's the deal?”
Fourth Guy: I just set my alarm for 5:30 AM. When it went off, I shut off my alarm, gave my wife a nudge and asked, “Fishing or Sex?” and she said, “Wear a Sweater.”

Big Baby
A Maritimer from New Brunswick is drinking in a New York bar when he gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar because he announces his wife has just produced a typical Maritime baby boy weighing 25 pounds. Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh 25 pounds, but the Maritimer just shrugs. “That's about average down home, I said, “my boy's a typical New Brunswick baby boy.” Congratulations showered him from all around and many exclamations of “WOW!” were heard. One woman actually fainted due to sympathy pains.

Two weeks later, he returns to the bar. The bartender says, “Say, you're the father of that typical New Brunswick baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth. Everybody's been makin' bets about how big he's gonna be in two how much does he weigh now?”

The proud father answers, “Seventeen pounds.” The bartender is puzzled and concerned and asks, “What happened? He already weighed 25 pounds the day he was born.” The Maritime father takes a slow swig from his long-necked Moose Head Beer...wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says, “Had him circumcised.”

No Work Today!
A guy rings up his boss and says, “I can't come to work today.” The boss asks why and the guy says, “It's my eyes.” The boss asks, “What's wrong with your eyes?” Solemnly, he replies, “I just can't see myself coming to I'm going fishing instead.”

Digging for Bait
Little Eddie and his mom were digging for fishing bait in their garden. Unearthing a many-legged creature, Eddie proudly dangled it before his mom. “No, honey, it won't do for bait,” she said. “It's not an earthworm.” Eddie asks, “It's not? What planet is it from?”

Bumper Stickers
Kids who HUNT, TRAP and FISH
Don't Mug Old Ladies

OCFD (and beside these letters is a long FISH)
Obsessive Compulsive Fishing Disorder

Merle Baird-Kerr...written October 18, 2014
Comments are welcome...e-mail to:


  1. FROM MOM & DAD MOHAMED: DILU WRITES, "An interesting read. Aba and I went to New Brunswick a few years ago. I fell in love with the province. The people were so warm and friendly!"

  2. Our Maritime provinces are certainly Canada's early beginnings...and are absolute 'jewels' in our country's crown.
    I always appreciate your insight.