Friday, November 25, 2016

How the Internet Started, According to the Bible

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com
did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy (Dot for short).
Dot Com was a comely woman...
large of breast...broad of shoulder...and long of leg.
Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, “Why dost thou travel from town, to town, to town with thy goods, when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?”

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags
short of a camel load, but simply said, “How Dear?”

And Dot replied, “I will place drums in all the towns...and drums in between, to send messages saying what you have for sale...and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the drums...and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS).

Abraham thought long and hard...and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent.

To prevent neighbouring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures ~ Hebrew to the People (HTTP).

And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites...or NERDS. And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought out every drum maker in the land. Indeed, he did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, “Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others. “And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel”, (e-Bay as it came to be known). He said, “We need a name that reflects what we are.”
And Dot replied, “Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators.”
Abraham 'got it' and said, “YAHOO Dot Com!”

Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside. It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE). That's how it all began!
And today, we know it as BIOTI...Best Info On The Internet!

(The foregoing sent to me by a friend, Jeanne)

Written by Merle Baird-Kerr...November 25, 2016


  1. SHERRIE Comments: "Oh,Merle...This is just so cute for words...cleverly done! A Great Friend who sent you this!"

  2. This friend sends me ever so many,worthy of smiles and contemplation...the occasional one I copy for blog or program use. So pleased was I to receive this from her. Thank you Sherrie for your continued interest.