This reading is only for those whose level of maturity
qualifies them to relate to it:
1960: Long hair
2013: Longing for hair
1960: Acid rock
2013: Acid reflex
1960: Moving to California because it's cool
2013: Moving to Arizona because it's warm
1960: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2013: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
1960: Seeds and stems
1960: Hoping for a BMW
2013: Hoping for a BM
1960: Going to a new “hip joint”
2013: Receiving a new hip joint
1960: Rolling Stones
2013: Kidney stones
1960: Screw the system
2013: Upgrade the system
1960: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2013: Children begging you get their heads shaved
1960: Passing the drivers' test
2013: Passing the vision test
Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things.
Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to
give the faculty a sense of the mindset of this year's incoming freshmen.
Here's this year's list:
The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born 1994.
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
The CD was introduced 3 years before they were born.
They have always had an answering machine.
They have always had cable.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
They never heard: “Where's the Beef?”
“I'd walk a mile for a Camel.”
"Boss, de plane...”
They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.
McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.
Do you feel old yet?
Pass this on to the other old fogies on your list.
It is good to have friends who know about these things
and are still alive and kicking!!!
These Fit so Well … They Should be in a Dictionary:
ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends
and is now growing in the middle
BEAUTY SALON: A place women curl up and dye.
CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and
after they are dead.
COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.
EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.
HANDKERCHIEF: Cold storage
INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.
RAISIN: A grape with a sunburn.
SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.
SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.
TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.
TOMORROW: One of the greatest labour saving devices of today
YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.
WRINKLES: Something other people have,
similar to my character lines.
The “Y” Chromosome
People born before 1946 are called : The Greatest Generation.
People born between 1946 and 1964 are called: The Baby Boomers.
People born between 1965 and 1979 are called: Generation X.
People born between 1980 and 2010 are called: Generation Y
Why do we call the last group ~ Generation Y ?
Y should I get a job?
Y should I leave home and find my own place?
Y should I get a car when I can borrow yours?
Y should I clean my room?
Y should I wash and iron my clothes?
Y should I buy any food?
(All of the foregoing was sent to me by a few of my ardent readers)
Words of Wisdom
“A cautious people learns from its past;
A sensible people can face the future;
Canadians, on the whole, are both!”
Merle Baird-Kerr … written February 7, 2013
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