Numerous incidents
I've blog-written…about farm living until I was 18.
Yes...our family was
together almost 24/7 (as we call it today).
Due to daily
chores, any holiday beyond a day's travel was impossible.
One extended vacation was an extreme thrill to my parents,
my one-year-older
sister and me (at the time, we were 17 and 16). It had been my father's dream
to drive to Canada's
west coast. When he sold his last farm,
his dream became reality!
He bought a new burgundy red Studebaker (you know the one
with the engine
in the back and trunk in front?). At the onset of this wondrous trip, it was
the
first time I'd seen my parents truly happy: it was a sense of freedom, a holiday
together for three weeks, and the beginning of a new career
for him in the fall.
So many highlights I could write about...but just to
highlight a few:
The drive to
Northern Ontario to what was then...Fort William
and Port Arthur (now known as Thunder Bay) was most scenic;
then the
drive across the vast golden prairies toward our
Rocky Mountains.
Vividly, I recall driving through Kicking
Horse
Pass....a gravel road....no guard rails along the sides
and my
mother terrified to “look down” into the deep chasms!
So exciting
to reach the Pacific Ocean and to dip our feet into
its blue
waters. The ferry to Vancouver
Island...a boat holding
cars...Imagine!!!
The return
drive through the Northern
States...their “plains”
and on to Illinois. We attended a
Chicago White Sox baseball game
…how
thrilling for my Dad and me!
Of great
pleasure to him was...airports. As we parked along
the outer
fences and for a couple hours, we watched airplanes
descending
from the skies to land...how magnificent!
And to
see others
“take off” with accelerating speed “into the blue”
for their
destinations.
These times together
as a family, were “awesome”!
We shall always
remember the camaraderie
that became
“alive”...embracing our four lives
together...experiences
we never before experienced.
Let's jump back a couple or more generations.
Women who married usually lacked post-secondary-education.
Their roles in life were to marry, become a mother,
support her husband's vocation and run the household
efficiently.
Fortunately, for children, the family unit was usually
vibrant...a parent
was available 24 hours a day to settle sibling disputes, to
teach activities
within the family environment, to establish security and
stability for them
in their growing years.
The children learned good manners, they learned
to participate in household tasks, they learned respect for
their parents and
relatives. Love...was
bonded and prevalent between parents and children.
Over the past couple of generations, the “cost of living”
increased and
one salary became insufficient to raise a family. Women pursued college
and university education, established themselves in
business...and usually
did not marry until in their mid-20's or later.
The “family unit”, in most cases became disrupted and vastly
affected:
Young
children were placed in Day Care 2 to 4 or 5 days per week.
Parents
sometimes hired an “aux pair” or “nanny”
to replace
mother and
father at home.
Children,
often had a 2-tier-system-upbringing which often
created
confusion in discipline and behavior.
Chaos often
resulted and the unhappiness was often carried into
the classrooms.
It behooves parents
in our current world to...
maintain Family Ties
and to create Family Bonding.
Today, it could be said,
The Family who Holidays
Together,
Stays Together.
A recent article, by Lakshmi
Menon in the Hamilton Spectator
says it best:
7 Benefits of
Family Travel
Taking a break from your routine life and going on a
vacation with your family,
once or twice a year has tremendous benefits for
everyone. Whether it's a fun-
filled escape to Great Wolf Lodge or a vacation to Disneyland All-Star-Resorts
(bathing suits required for both), here are seven
benefits of taking a family break:
Family members are usually so busy with work, school and
activities that they
don't get adequate time to interact with each other,
although they live together
in the same house.
A family vacation provides ample
opportunity for everyone
to have heart-to-heart-conversations and exchange jokes
in a more relaxed way.
The whole family takes part in the planning of a vacation
in one way or other.
This gives everyone an opportunity to contribute ideas
which makes them take
ownership of the trip and therefore more happy to
participate.
If you plan a vacation in a different area or country, it
provides an opportunity
to learn about a new culture, or different way of doing
things in a personal way.
Children can share their thoughts with their parents
about the new culture
and also give parents a new perspective.
Enjoy your kids during this stage when they need you the
most. Later in their
lives, they may not need your help to accompany them for
a vacation...
so value their closeness now.
Taking a holiday with
family helps you bond together in a better way
because of the particular nature of being together. During a vacation,
children consider you more like a friend or playmate and
discuss things with
you more freely.
You too will find a friend in your child during these times.
If you are a
parent who works outside the home, you can enjoy maximum
time with your kids and make up for the loss during
routine life. They will
look forward to such occasions to get more time and
attention from you.
Vacations should make you feel more energized and less
tense while you
forget the daily responsibilities of work, chores and
bills. You and the
kids all benefit from this more relaxed attitude.
Caribbean Cruise
While my son was in university and my daughter in High
School, I was busily
working to support our family...in addition to car expenses
and household costs.
My job entailed working Sundays. We managed quite well since my daughter
was frequently competing in horse shows...early in the
morning, I drove her to
the stables to prepare her horse for van-loading prior to
her horse show
destination. After my workday, I would return to the stables to await her
return
...then home to prepare dinner...usually in the oven on a
timer.
Soon I recognized the significance to spend quality time
with both.
We discussed a Caribbean Island Cruise over the Christmas
holidays...
places where they had never been (nor I), a mix of culture
from island
to island, activities
aboard ship and side trips when in port, the varieties
of food and entertainment aboard ship.
We flew to Puerto Rico to connect with the 2nd week of a cruise (from Miami)
already a-sea. This
was perfect for us with “port calls” every day except one.
We took turns selecting one of 3 or 4 optional side
trips. We went together…
to share these experiences.
This “family agreement” worked wonderfully.
In Venezuela,
at our port call, my daughter chose a “jeep tour” around the
coastline. A barbecue
lunch was prepared for us at a fishing village beside
a crystal waterfall and deep clear water pool. How refreshing that cool
water was… as it gently flowed into the Caribbean
Sea.
This was a wonderful venture…immensely enjoyed by the three
of us..
On the dock we met a family with two teenage boys from Norwich, Ontario
(my mother’s home town)
Christmas Eve we spent in Curacao. So excited we were to see tropical trees
and flower bushes dressed in colourful lights. Even a few evergreens had been
imported to symbolize the Christmas season. Last-minute-shoppers was
evident everywhere…as at home. My daughter’s great “find” was a
McDonald’s… for her burger-fries-coke “fix”!
At 11 pm back on ship, all passengers flocked to the decks
to sing
Christmas carols accompanied by the ship band. I cannot explain
the beauty of this
emotionally joyous experience under the tropical
moon and midnight-star-studded-sky.
We had taken a small
gift for each to unwrap on Christmas Day.
How pleasurable to open these gifts in Aruba
before leaving to tour
the island’s rugged wind-swept north coast and the more
placid
waters and resorts along the south coast.
These two islands seemed like gems of paradise set in an
emerald green sea.
I was so elated…and they so thrilled…to enjoy these seven
days
together…a holiday we’ve never been able to duplicate…
due to jobs, further educational studies, marriages…
and now their children.
A Most Memorable Holiday Together!
And to this day,
they are not only my
son and daughter
…we are Great
Friends!
Words of Wisdom from “Buddha”
A family is a place where minds
come in contact with one another.
If these minds love one another,
the home will be as beautiful as a
flower garden.
But if these minds get out of harmony with one another,
It is like a storm that plays havoc with the garden.
Merle Baird-Kerr … written November 23, 2012
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