worth a smile or two and many more!
How can Santa deliver presents
during a thunderstorm?
His
sleigh is flown by raindeer.
What
do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite!
What did the stamp say to the Christmas card?
Stick with me
and we’ll go places.
Why don’t you ever see Santa in hospital?
Because he has
private elf care!
Why is it getting harder to buy Advent calendars?
Their days
are numbered.
What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games
in a hotel lobby?
Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!
What did the beaver say to the Christmas tree?
Nice gnawing
you.
What do you call a snowman with a six pack?
An abdominal
snowman.
What do you call a kid who
doesn’t believe in Santa?
A
rebel without a Clause.
Who is Santa’s favourite singer?
Elf-isPresley.
What do the elves call when
Father Christmas claps his hands a the end of play?
Santapplause!
How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
Nothing. It was on
the house.
Why did Santa’s helper see the doctor?
Because he had a low
‘elf’ esteem!’
Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy!
How do snowmen get around?
They ride an icicle!
What does Santa do when his elves misbehave?
He gives them
the sack!
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?
Tinsilitis!
What’s
green, covered in tinsel
and goes ribbet ribbet?
A
mistle-toad!
Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing?
They always drop
their needles.
What would you call an elf who just won the lottery?
Welfy!
What would you call Santa’s helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.
The foregoing, a couple years ago, I discovered in a Christmas magazine edition.
Posted by MBK December,2020
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