Monday, February 18, 2013

As The World Changes...So Do The Words




                 This reading is only for those whose level of maturity
                 qualifies them to relate to it:

             1960: Long hair
             2013: Longing for hair
                 
                 1960: KEG
                 2013: EKG

                 1960: Acid rock                  
                 2013: Acid reflex

                 1960: Moving to California because it's cool
                 2013: Moving to Arizona because it's warm

                 1960: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
                 2013: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

                 1960: Seeds and stems
                 2013: Roughage

                 1960: Hoping for a BMW
                 2013: Hoping for a BM
                
                 1960: Going to a new “hip joint”
                 2013: Receiving a new hip joint

                 1960: Rolling Stones
                 2013: Kidney stones

                 1960: Screw the system
                 2013: Upgrade the system

                 1960: Disco
                 2013: Costco

                 1960: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
                 2013: Children begging you get their heads shaved

                 1960: Passing the drivers' test
                 2013: Passing the vision test

                 1960: Whatever
                 2013: Depends

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things.
Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to
give the faculty a sense of the mindset of this year's incoming freshmen.
Here's this year's list:

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born 1994.

They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.

Their lifetime has always included AIDS.

Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.

The CD was introduced 3 years before they were born.

They have always had an answering machine.

They have always had cable.

They cannot fathom not having a remote control.

Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.

Popcorn has always been cooked in the  microwave.

They never  took a swim and thought about Jaws.

They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.

They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.

They never heard:  “Where's the Beef?”
                                        “I'd walk a mile for a Camel.”
                                        "Boss, de plane...”

They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.

McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.

They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.

Do you feel old yet? 
Pass this on to the other old fogies on your list.
It is good to have friends who know about these things
and are still alive and kicking!!!

These Fit so Well … They Should be in a Dictionary:

                 ADULT:  A person who has stopped growing at both ends
                                    and is now growing in the middle

                 BEAUTY SALON: A place women curl up and dye.

                 CHICKENS:  The only animals you eat before they are born and
                                            after they are dead.

                 COMMITTEE:  A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

                 DUST:  Mud with the juice squeezed out.

                 EGOTIST:  Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

                 HANDKERCHIEF:  Cold storage
.
                 INFLATION:  Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

                 MOSQUITO:  An insect that makes you like flies better.

                 RAISIN:  A grape with a sunburn.

                 SECRET:  Something you tell to one person at a time.

                 SKELETON:  A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

                 TOOTHACHE:  The pain that drives you to extraction.

                 TOMORROW:  One of the greatest labour saving devices of today

                 YAWN:  An honest opinion openly expressed.

                 WRINKLES:  Something other people have,
                                             similar to my character lines.

The “Y” Chromosome

             People born before 1946 are called : The Greatest Generation.
                 People born between 1946 and 1964 are called: The Baby Boomers.
                 People born between 1965 and 1979 are called: Generation X.
                 People born between 1980 and 2010 are called:  Generation Y

                                         Why do we call the last group ~ Generation Y ? 
                                          Y should I get a job?
                                          Y should I leave home and find my own place?
                                          Y should I get a car when I can borrow yours?
                                          Y should I clean my room?
                                          Y should I wash and iron my clothes?
                                          Y should I buy any food?

(All of the foregoing was sent to me by a few of my ardent readers)

Words of Wisdom

“A cautious people learns from its past;
A sensible people can face the future;
Canadians, on the whole, are both!”
(Author unknown)

Merle Baird-Kerr … written February 7, 2013
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or e-mail...inezkate@gmail.com

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