Animal Mothers
Remind Us a Lot of Our Own
For animals, great and small, it is often up to Mom to teach them
how to survive and use their instincts wisely. (Unknown author)
Animal Moms are legendary ~
from the humpback whale's unfailing devotion to her calf
to the tiny poison-dart frog who grows to great lengths
to raise her helpless tadpoles. (Anonymous)
The job of the Mom ~ whether you are a human or another animal ~
is to raise kids who can protect and feed themselves and
eventually leave the nest.
The
Dream of Becoming a Mother
“May
is a wonderful month. It brings spring, new beginnings ~ and is the
month we celebrate Mother's Day. Many aspirations from children and
their hopes for the future, were created from what they learned at
school ~ and from what they have witnessed and watched first-hand
from family, friends, movies and social media. From many, the dreams
shared have involved becoming parents and raising children. It is a
popular saying, that 'you are the average of 5 people you spend the
most time with.'
“Aside
from our own mothers, who would be for most of us, our prime example,
there are our friends and other family members that probably make up
our 5 people of influence. For many of us, 'mothering and
caregiving' is instinctual, but for others, is a consciously learned
skill ~ and this is one of the main reasons why moms and other
care-givers need active and engaged community support.
As community participants, we all have important roles to play:
perhaps as a school/club mentor or as the primary caregiver of a
child.
But 'dreams don't always come true and plans can suddenly falter.
“What
if our childhood aspirations don't come true? What happens if our
dream of a relationship and co-parenting together does not exist?
What if the partner we are sharing our life with, slowly begins to
mistreat us? What if our choice to have a child later in life is
taken from us due to a pregnancy resulting from rape? What if our
dreams of a stable partnership become the reality of domestic abuse?
Abuse is not only physical, it can be emotional, verbal, financial,
sexual, psychological and social...including threats, intimidation,
isolation
and any behaviour that is intended to control, humiliate or harm.
“Although
80% of domestic violence victims tell family or friends of their
situation, only 30% report the abuse to the police We need to be
part of their 'five people of influence' who can assist her with
help.
The ability of honouring Moms, is not only in May but in everyone's
ability every day!
We must be More than a Bystander!”
The foregoing are excerpts from a writing by Nancy Smith,
Executive Director of Hamilton 24-hour Crisis Line.
In the animal kingdom, the rule is 'Eat or be Eaten.'
In the human kingdom, define ~ or be defined,' stated byThomas
Szasz.
The wolf is an excellent model of 'motherhood.'
A
Journey Back in Time ~ Finds his Birth Mother
It began with a heart attack in the Pentagon parking lot in pre-dawn
darkness.
Air Force Col. Bruce Hollywood was on his way to work and found
himself on the ground, thinking:
“This
is where it ends.” Later, as he lay in the ambulance racing to
Walter Reed Army Hospital, 2 regrets popped into his head. One was
that he wouldn't be able to help his son with his college
applications. The other was that he never thanked the Japanese woman
who gave birth to him, then gave him up for adoption in 1960. (Bruce
Hollywood was adopted by an American couple who were stationed in
Japan with the U.S. military and could offer him a good life in
America.) It took that heart attack in 2005 for him to set out to
find his birth mother,
“I
always knew I was adopted because I had Asian features and (my
father) was an Irishman and (my mother) was a Norwegian lady,” said
Hollywood, 57 ~ and they always told me ~ “We picked you out
special. So you're even more special than everyone else.” His
parents had told him his birth mother's family name and even offered
to pay for a flight to Japan for him. He had always declined.
But,
once he recovered from his heart attack, Hollywood began his search.
His plan was to send his mother a secret letter, in case she never
told anyone she had a son. He wanted her to know how wonderful his
life turned out, to show her gratitude by writing, “I
lived the best life ever. I'm a Colonel in the U.S. Airforce. I've
got beautiful children. Life is really good.”
He gave up after contacting the Japanese Embassy...the U.S. Embassy
in Tokyo...and.a private detective.
A few months later, he was at Dulles International Airport in
Virginia,
on his way to a military conference in Germany.
Early for his flight, he sat down at a wine bar. Across from him was
another military man who was going to the same conference: Adm. Harry
Harris, whose mother was Japanese. (Today, he is commander of U.S.
forces in the Pacific and had been nominated to be ambassador to
South Korea.)
Due to his 'Embassy status,' Harris was able to make contacts.
Ten
days later, sitting at his desk in the Pentagon, Hollywood's phone
rang. The message was, We
found your mother, Nobue Ouchi. She's going to call you at this phone
number in10 minutes...and she doesn't speak English. Good Luck!”
After
urgent emails, Hollywood found someone who could interpret on a
conference call. Moments later, the phone rang ~ it was his mother ~
and she was crying. For the next few minutes, Hollywood listened to
the interpreter who informed him, Tomorrow
is your mother's 65th
birthday...and the birthday present that she dreamed of, her whole
life, is that you would come back to her. The
interpretor said his mother never married, 'because she said in her
heart there was only room for one man. And it was you...and she knew
you would be back.
And then the interpreter said, “Your mother ran her own business ~
a restaurant
and bar she named 'Bruce.'
Ten days later, Bruce Hollywood was in Shizuoka, Japan ~ a couple
hours by train from Tokyo, where she lived. Finding his mother, gave
him an identity as a Japanese American. Today he is on the boards of
the Japanese American Veterans Association...and the Japanese
American Memorial to WWII.
There is no instinct like that of the heart. (Lord Byron)
Life is the best gift a person can give. If you want to show your
gratitude, the best thing you can give in return, is love ~ not only
to another human being, but other living beings as well.
(April Peerless)
Compiled by Merle Baird-Kerr...May 12, 2018
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