Love is in the Air...
recognized for its lyrics, it has been the current month's atmosphere that has
been generated by Valentine's Day and Family Day (the latter in Ontario). Local radio and television stations promoted
February as... “Love is on the Air” with music, movies and
advertisements. Romance has been “on a
high” with sentimental cards, chocolates, flowers, other gift gestures and
perhaps an intimate dinner together with a “love-mate”. February gives us that
lovin’ feeling!
Soul Sacrifice
Carlos Santana (age 62) proposed
to his drummer on stage. The guitar
legend popped the question to Cindy Blackman (age 50) during a concert in
Chicago. “Cindy and I are blessed to
have found each other. Being in love is
a gift from the Universe; and the
spirit and vibrations that come with it...are mighty powerful.”
An invisible
thread connects those who were destined to meet
...regardless of
the time, place and circumstances.
The thread may
stretch or tangle...but it will not break.
(Author Unknown)
Ten Simple Ways to
Make a Relationship or Marriage Last
The fundamental rules for human
interaction ~ kindness, fairness and respect ~ are taught to us as young
children. Unfortunately, many of these
lessons are forgotten (or unlearned) by the time we reach adulthood. Treating others the way we'd like to be
treated seems simple enough...until we have to do it everyday. Relationships are not “rocket science”, but
they do call for the same level of patience and dedication. Here's a quick refresher on how to treat your
mate that helps you go the distance.
Be kind (not nice). Niceness is one rule that can actually
backfire in a romantic relationship.
Some partners can interpret niceness as weakness. Moreover, niceness is often insincere...being
a coping mechanism taught to us as children to help us deal with people we
don't really like. True kindness, by
contrast, doesn't condescend or pretend!
Kindness looks to the core-worth of another person and responds
accordingly. Kindness doesn't mean
avoiding conflict or even always “playing nice”...it is processing issues with
sincere respect for your mate's feelings.
Be sexually generous. When
you put your mate's sexual needs first, your own are likely to be satisfied as
well. If your needs continue to be
unmet, just don't seethe about it...communicate with him or her.
Be there. Your presence, both physical and
emotional, is critical to the survival of your relationship. Try to be present in the moment and to
be sensitive to your mate's emotional state. If your job or other obligations routinely
keep you away from your mate, take a hard look at your options and determine
what is best for your relationship.
Be grateful. Before you rush to judge, take a step
back and remember what you have in your partner. Is he or she loyal, considerate or kind? What flaws of yours does your mate patiently
endure?
Be helpful. You shouldn't be helpful just for the
sake of getting what you want. But you'd
be surprised at how often helping your partner out...especially when he or she
is stressed...can yield the kind of response you crave most.
Don't over-romanticize. Drop your delusions and see how much room
it frees up for real love.
Don't over-dramatize. If you are one of those who thrive on
drama, you are bound to be disappointed by any healthy relationship. Where no drama exists, drama addicts will
find ways to manufacture it.
Don't nag or nitpick. You may think your “constructive”
criticism or helpful reminders will help mould your mate into your ideal.
More likely, it will just wear them out.
You may or may not get what you want but you might get resentment.
Don't lose focus. We live in a hyper-saturated,
hyper-stimulated world. Beauty is
distorted, augmented and air-brushed.
Destructive behaviours are exaggerated
(and glamourized) by “reality” shows.
It seems like everyone is misbehaving and if you aren't, you must be
missing out. But the desire for
meaningful relationships is at the core of the human heart. You can try to take the shortcut to this kind
of happiness by responding to every enticement.
Or you can choose to focus on a real relationship...and enjoy the
enduring pleasures such a relationship provides.
Don't be selfish. Selfishness underlies most of our broken
relationships ~ and it is a hard habit to break. It can take many forms: financial, behavioural, emotional or
sexual. Chronic selfishness can do lasting
damage to a relationship.
(The foregoing are
excerpts from... twoofus.org.)
Pearls of
Wisdom
No matter how old
you both get,
never stop holding
hands;
never stop
dancing;
never stop saying,
“I love you.”
(Anonymous)
Merle
Baird-Kerr...scripted February 21, 2014
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