Friday, May 17, 2013

Computer Craze (Part I)



Many years ago when businesses first implemented the use of computers,
the Royal Bank in my neighbourhood had a small printed sign at each  teller's window:

To err is human...
to really foul things up
takes a computer!

Since the inception of new technology storing data and executing its knowledge, systems have become quite complex and to some people...very complicated.  Numerous courses are available through schools and Seniors' centres.  Degrees can be earned through universities in Mathematics or Computer Science.  Yes....computer use has become a “science”! 

Finally...Computer Settings I  Understand!
(thanks to Sydney’s sending to me)

Windows cannot find the file.  Would you like wine instead?
Click on....YES...or...NO.

You have been online for one year.  Do you wish to log off and get a life?
Click on...YES...or...No...or...Remind me Next Year.

Plus several cartoons depicting  everyday dilemmas.

Computers' Humourous Situations and Outcomes

HELP!  I'm online and I can't get OFF!

All I did was hit the DELETE button...and my computer
went POOF and disappeared.

(Picture depicts a man on his hands and knees
behind his computer desk amid...wires, wires, wires)
Advice to him from technician on the telephone to him,
“Now...if you can find the Power Switch,
FLIP IT ON!”

A woman goes to her outside mailbox to retrieve letters
(but the box is empty).
She mutters to herself,  “The computer keeps saying,
“You've got MAIL”!

An elated looking cat is sitting at the computer
observing his clever action...
“COOL!  I just sold the dog on E-BAY!”

A man is sitting at his computer desk; his yellow pet tabby cat
is sprawled across his right knee, with  head and glowing eyes, resting
where the mouse should have been.
Man comments, “ It's going to take me a little longer
to answer my e-mails now.”

Sitting at her computer, a woman is totally frustrated
and states, “I keep hitting  ESCAPE...
but I'm still here!!!”

Home computers are the perfect thing for Women
who don't feel that Men provide them with
enough frustration!

Ever notice, the older we get, the more we're like computers.
We start out with lots of MEMORY and DRIVE!

Life...Before Computers

Memory was something you lost with age.
An Application was for employment.
A Program was a TV show.
A Cursor used profanity.
A Keyboard was a piano.
A Web was a spider's home.
A Virus was the flu.
A CD was a bank account.
A Hard Drive was a long trip on the road.
A Mouse pad was where the mouse lived.
And if you had a 3 ½ Inch Floppy ~
you just hoped nobody found out.

Although my son is a Technical Analyst, I am far from being “computer literate”.  Computers often are an Enigma to me…puzzling and confusing. However, through his guidance, I’ve been able to develop a Blog…said procedure has now become automatic. He bails me out of difficulties and places me again “online” for research, e-mails and the learning of one or more new techniques.
How fortunate…I am!

Merle Baird-Kerr...written January 25, 2013.
Comments welcome...scroll down...may sign in as “anonymous”
or e-mail...inezkate@gmail.com

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